What makes a marriage last?

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Wedding days are fabulous – filled with happiness and optimism. No couple thinks their marriage will be one of those which does not stand the test of time. What’s more, I’m no expert, having had my first marriage end in divorce after 20 years.

I have however, seen lots of really long and happy marriages amongst family and friends. Analysing just what makes these successful marriages tick, it comes down to three things – what I call the 3 Ls – Love, Luck and Laughter.

I recently did a Renewal of Vows for a 40th Wedding Anniversary and Love what what shone out from this couple. They were obviously devoted to each other as were friends and family members. It was a love which manifested as working together and as kindness towards each other. They wanted the very best for each other, not themselves.

Luck is a big one too.  It is luck to find and keep the right partner. It can be luck that you grow together instead of apart. It is luck which throws some of life’s hurdles and tragedies at you.  Some marriages break apart at these events, others glue together. I have friends who lost a child some years ago. They are fiercely determined to support and nurture each other and the remaining family they have.

We all know what good medicine Laughter is. Couples and families whose lives are filled with laughter can ride out storms of stress, enjoy life and the company of others. Laughter models a great outlook on life for family members and it helps people deal with ‘the hard stuff’.

I hope yours is a marriage filled with the 3 Ls – Love, Luck and Laughter.

A rear view of the bride and groom holding hands, looking at each other and walking down a pathway in the forest.